A sense of entitlement

WARNING - Rant ahead...

I'm curious about something.  Where did this sense of entitlement come from?  I've seen it both on the soldier side and spouse side of things.  Deployments these days are easier than deployments were even a couple years ago.  That's not to say that there isn't still risks, but when FaceTime and Skype are a daily or weekly part of your life, then be thankful.

Lately, I've seen a lot of things and heard a lot of things about how four days need to be made up or how it sucks that leave has to be taken during block leave or how there are details that are being required of soldiers that suck.  Well, here's the reality - four days aren't made up, they never have been and there are a heck of a lot less four days in nine months than there are in twelve or fifteen months.  Not only that, up to a couple months prior to deployment you still had soldiers going TDY and missing those times at home.  When we were in Germany, our soldiers ran two constant training sites and were required to have a MEDEVAC crew at each location 51 weeks of the year.  There were only two MEDEVAC companies in all of Germany and one was always deployed, so that left the coverage to the unit that was pending their next deployment.  Those included four days missed and time missed with their family as they were gearing up for a deployment.

FaceTime and Skype...  I will be honest, last deployment I had no idea what those even were.  My husband had a cell phone, but 95% of the time he was in remote sites where there wasn't even signal for an Afghan cell phone.  So being able to Skype was something that wasn't happening.  Our main method of communication was the old pen and paper.  You deal with it and make the most of the situation.  Over times it was weeks before I got a letter and that was the only time I heard from my husband.  This deployment, having Skype was amazing.  But it was still something that was rare, I can count on one hand the number of times we Skyped in the five months he was gone.  He was on a regular rotation of being on MEDEVAC duty and didn't really have good internet access when he was living down on the flight line.  And yes, my husband came home early from deployment, but it was because we are moving to another location and that's after five deployments between us combined and now with him staying in, more deployments to come.

On the soldier side of things, leave isn't something that has to be granted.  It's not like in the civilian world where you turn in vacation time and that's it.  There is a couple different steps that leave form has to go through and it can be denied, whether it's because a soldier didn't pass a APFT (Army Physical Fitness Test), they are overweight or just because mission dictates that it's not feasible.  There is also a whole checklist required with that leave form and if any part of it is not complete or wrong, it will be kicked back.  Block leave is also something that is not required.  When I returned from my last deployment, I didn't get one day of leave.  When my husband returned from his last deployment, he didn't either and two months after he got back he was sent stateside for six weeks TDY.

Another thing that I heard recently that is irritating was that military spouses were talking down to a veteran because she just had her school being paid for handed to her.  I'm pretty sure that one, there is payments that come out the first year of service to pay into that.  Second, that comes with a lot of wear and tear to your body.  It also comes with being away from home, whether for temporary duty, training and/or deployment.  It's not just handed to a veteran.

I've also heard people complaining about details that a service member may be doing.  There is a lot of stuff that we didn't sign up to do.  I never signed up to police call someone else's cigarettes or clean a bathroom or drive random military vehicles or babysit junior soldiers or be a pee collector, but it's all part of the deal.  You take it for what it is and make the most of it.

Lastly, then I will be done.  The military health care system... it's not the best, but it is health care.  It's something that many people don't have or they pay a very large amount for it.  The people that have the right to complain about the lack of proper health care they have received is people like a friend of mine who is still in the hospital 18 months after his helicopter crashed in Afghanistan.  He was told he would never walk again, but after fighting an uphill battle not only with the injuries he sustained, but with a lack of those qualified to properly treat him.  Another example was my cousin, who was MEDEVACd out three times.  He sustained severe head injuries which has caused him issues with memories and a slew of other ongoing issues, yet when he was going through the MEB process, not only was he told he would never be able to go to school because he no longer had the mental capacity, but he was also denied a percentage of disability he should have been given.  This is an ongoing battle for veterans.  They have to fight for every little bit of compensation they are given and that's including through the VA.

My point - be thankful.  Be thankful for what you have. Be thankful that your soldier is in a position to only have to deal with the crappy details, so they don't have to be apart of the mess of war.  Be thankful your soldier is coming home in one piece, because many deal with the long team affects of those broken pieces whether it's a visible injury or one of the hidden injuries.  Be thankful your service member is coming home, because over 6000 families haven't had that chance.  Be thankful for the opportunity to be apart of this family we call the military, because many will never know the camaraderie that we have.  Be thankful for the times when your soldier is home, because you never know when they will have to leave again.  Be thankful for the times they are gone, because you are able to take on a new challenge and push yourself to limits you never thought possible.  Don't get me wrong, I have days I hate the Army, not only when my husband has to leave, but as a veteran, for the daily pain I deal with from my time in.  But we need to take a step back and realize that our situation isn't that bad.